Category: Personal Orthodox Experiences

  • Journey Into the Heart of ROCOR

    Today I was talking to a historian friend on Facebook. He mentioned how he loves pouring over reams of historical data, something which bores other people to tears. I told him I share his passion. That sparked a memory of a most curious and interesting event that occurred during the writing of my thesis on Metropolitan Petros of Astoria: my journey into the heart of the Russian Orthodox Church Outside Russia (ROCOR).

    While a seminarian at St. Vladimir’s Seminary in nearby Yonkers, New York, I became interested in the Greek Old Calendarists, much to the chagrin of some of my professors and fellow students (one fellow student, seeing an issue of Orthodox Tradition with my name on it in the mail room, dramatically exclaimed to me, “tell me this is not where your heart is!” while a professor walking by me in the library and seeing me reading the same remarked, “you don’t really believe that s*t, do you?!”) . After investing hundreds—if not thousands—of hours researching the Old Calendarists, I decided to do my thesis on Metropolitan Petros of Astoria, the first legitimate Greek Old Calendarist bishop in America, ordained by ROCOR bishops in 1962.

    As part of my research for the thesis, I realized I would need access to the ROCOR Synodal Archives, where many documents pertaining to the ROCOR and its relations with the Greek Old Calendarists were kept. One of my fellow seminarians was a ROCOR monk who had recently returned from a monastery in Europe to continue his studies, and was given a blessing to attend St. Vladimir’s Seminary to do so. When not at the seminary, he resided at Holy Trinity Monastery in Jordanville, New York, where Metropolitan Laurus (+2008) lived as well. He spoke with the Metropolitan, who granted me permission to do research in the archives, located at the ROCOR Synodal headquarters.

    ROCOR Synod Headquarters
    ROCOR Synod Headquarters

    ROCOR’s international headquarters, often colloquially referred to as simply “Synod,” is located at 75 E 93rd Street in New York City. This building is part of The George F. Baker Houses, an iconic family compound of houses right off of Park Avenue in Manhattan, and was acquired by the ROCOR Synod of Bishops in 1958. It houses the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Sign (which was formerly the mansion’s grand ballroom), administrative offices, a kitchen, an apartment for the resident bishop (at that time, Bishop Gabriel lived there), and many individual rooms, some of which are inhabited by people who work at Synod, such as the tireless musician, translator, and composer Isaac Lambertsen.

    On the appointed day, I arrived at Synod to meet my monastic friend. An older gentleman manned the door, dressed in a suit and tie, reading a Russian newspaper, and occasionally answering the phone. The lobby was immaculately clean, although the lighting was dim—what would become a recurring theme. I announced who I was, and he phoned my friend, who promptly came downstairs and greeted me. He then proceeded to give me the tour.

    Synod was sort of like something similar to Walt Disney World’s Haunted Mansion. It’s a huge building, half empty, with numerous winding hallways and staircases. But as one transects the numerous floors, instead of encountering ghosts doing various tasks as in Disney World, one instead would find various individuals quietly going about their business. Some were working, while others were sitting around conversing in low voices. If this were a Greek Orthodox operation, the noise level would be five times higher, and the various hangers-around would be more welcoming and animated, but as Synod is a fully Russian institution, the result was a rather low key experience where one had the distinct impression that people were at best indifferent and perhaps even mildly hostile to the presence of strangers.

    In the kitchen, older women cooked, which is something that happens in all Orthodox institutions where there are kitchens. I recall being offered soup or something likewise hearty. My friend and handler then took me to a small door with a small pane of glass. Opening it, there was a bricked in wall. Visions of someone being bricked in as a medieval punishment came to mind, but a far more tame explanation was offered: the original owners were so rich, that they had their own subway stop for the workers to use daily, but as New York modernized and reorganized its subway system, such perks for the rich were gradually phased out, and the stop was bricked in. Adventurers would love to go into those abandoned tunnels, I’m sure.

    Going to one of the upper levels, we sought out Isaac Lambertsen’s room to greet him. Isaac and I had communicated a few times by email, and have a mutual friend in common. As I recall, the hallways were not straight, but rather formed something akin to an L-curve or perhaps a V-curve. The hallways were again dimly lit, and I admit that were I living there, I would be afraid to walk those halls at night, for fear of whatever person might have made it past the old man guarding the door and then laying in wait in one of the many empty rooms! Well, now I am being dramatic—I am sure they have a security system Nevertheless, there is something romantic about walking around narrow, dark, dimly-lit hallways in a mansion in Manhattan off Park Avenue, and it’s a memory that will stay with me forever.

    Finally, we arrived at the archives. At the time, Fr. Seraphim Gan was the archivist, and after the appropriate introductions, I was allowed access to the eight boxes on Old Calendarists. Boxes 1-7 were chronologically-organized, while box 8 was solely focused on one individual who has been in the center of some controversies in the history of the Old Calendarists. About half the material in that box was supportive, and the other half not-so-much.

    Beyond the Old Calendarist materials, there was a filing cabinet labelled in Russian, “Their Graces in Schism,” which was locked. I was told it pertained to those bishops whom ROCOR considered to be schismatic at the time, such as Metropolitan Valentine of ROAC. Also, there were filing cabinets with archives from Synodal meetings. All of the earlier material was solely in Russian. My friend pulled out one document from the 1950s, where Bishop John (Maximovitch)—now St. John—voiced support for the Old Calendarists and ordaining bishops for them, but when I asked if I could copy said document, I recall being told it was, “outside the purview of my blessing” or something to that effect. Indeed.

    We Americans do not have old castles or palaces. What we do have are old estates. Mt. Vernon, Monticello, and the like are all famous places where one can go and see a glimpse of life from a different age. ROCOR’s headquarters is also an estate; an urban estate and an oasis in the midst of the great hustle and bustle that is New York City. It clearly was in decline at the time I visited in 2005, but the people there had dignity nonetheless, and carried on their duties faithfully. I had mixed emotions about my visit: respect seeing a venerable religious institution; admiration of a work of American architecture; dismay at seeing the decline of what was probably once a vibrant community of co-laborers for the Gospel living in community; and a profound sadness that ROCOR would soon be reuniting with the Moscow Patriarchate, despite the serious reservations of many (for those who did not follow this course, see here). I was also grateful that I was able to see something that most people would never be able to see. Being a historian—even an amateur one—is something that opens up doors and contextualizes life.

    I was able to copy several hundred pages of documents from the ROCOR archives, which formed the nucleus for my work on Metropolitan Petros. In the process, I had a lot of fun exploring this intriguing and mysterious place, as well.

  • Metropolitan Demetrius’s Enthronement Weekend

    It was a blessing to be able to travel to Astoria, New York the weekend of April 27-28 (May 10-11 on the civil calendar) to attend the Enthronement of His Eminence Metropolitan Demetrius as the new Metropolitan of America and president of the Holy Eparchial Synod of the Church of the Genuine Orthodox Christians of America. This event marked both a new page in the life of our Metropolis and Eparchy in America, and also was a witness to the recent Church union which occurred in March, when ten bishops of the former Synod in Resistance united to our Synod and through them we entered into full communion with the Russian Orthodox Church Abroad under Metropolitan Agafangel, and the Romanian Old Calendar Church under Metropolitan Vlasie.

    Both Metropolitans Agafangel and Vlasie sent episcopal representatives to this event (Archbishop Andronik of Syracuse, and Bishops Iosif of Botoşani and Dionisie of Galaţi), who joined the two Metropolitans sent from Greece (Metropolitans Chrysostomos of Attica and Gerontios of Piraeus), the American-born bishops resident in North America (Metropolitan Moses of Toronto, and Bishops Christodoulos of Theoupolis and Auxentios of Photike) and Metropolitan Pavlos, the former Metropolitan of America, whose retirement in late 2013 opened the path toward the Election and Enthronement of Metropolitan Demetrius. There were also twenty-two priests and eight deacons serving.

    I left my home in Reston, Virginia early Saturday morning, in order to be able to travel peacefully and without feeling rushed. There was no traffic, and I arrived at the Cathedral of St. Markella around 1:00 pm. One of the things I most like about the Cathedral is that it is open every day from around 8:00 am to 8:00 pm for Christians to come and pray and light candles, and attend services should they be occurring. There have been daily services in the morning and evening almost without interruption since its founding in 1954. One can only speculate as to how much the city of New York has benefitted from these prayers, and what would have happened were they not occurring continuously.

    I felt a bit of trepidation in my heart, because this was the first time returning to the Cathedral since I resigned from serving as a priest in April 2013 for personal reasons. My resignation came as a surprise to many, and I certainly let people down. I stayed away for some time to give things time to settle, but it was high time for me to return and see my old friends and associates. If anyone were to react toward me negatively, it certainly would have been good for my soul, but everyone was fair toward me and some were quite encouraging. I appreciated more than one person telling me that he had been praying for me and my family throughout this whole time.

    The Calm Before the Storm!
    The Calm Before the Storm!

    The Organizing Committee was busy doing the last-minute staging, so I sat quietly in the Church for several hours, praying, thinking, venerating icons, and just taking in the scene. A few old friends stopped by and said hello. A Synod meeting was occurring, so the clergy was mostly occupied. Around 3:00, the Synod meeting ended, and I was able to greet the bishops. I saw my ordaining bishop Metropolitan Pavlos for the first time in a year, and it was an emotional time. He was greatly disappointed in me, and yet when he saw me, he was compassionate and loving. I saw Metropolitan Chrysostomos of Attica, with whom I had served twice as a priest during concelebrations, and he offered me his prayers and counsel. My spirits were already being lifted up.

    2014MetDemEnthVes_005Around 5:30, Vespers began, with chanters from Chicago, Boston, and New York joining together to form a magnificent Byzantine choir. The chanting was excellent. I was especially happy that this weekend was the Sunday of the Paralytic, and the happy-sounding Mode 3 was the appointed mode, which made things especially joyous sounding. Vespers continued for about an hour, and afterward, we were served a delicious meal downstairs by the women of St. Markella’s, with help from other faithful serving us. I had the opportunity to speak to some of the other bishops and clergy, as well as my Koumbaro and Koumbara (my daughter Sophia’s godparents), and make the acquaintance of some of our Detroit faithful whom I had not previously met. I made it back to the hotel at 10:00 pm, checked in, got some midnight snacks, and uploaded photos and videos from the day.

    Exterior of the Cathedral of St. Markella
    Exterior of the Cathedral of St. Markella

    I intended to make it to Matins at the beginning, which was around 7:00 am, but human weakness being what it was, I overslept and made it at 8:45, just missing the censing during Matins and the singing of “More Honorable Than the Cherubim.” It was a warm day, and being someone who has visceral reactions to cold weather, I felt comfortable in the warm sunlight and walked from my parking spot to the Cathedral. The prayers during the Spring and Summer, when the doors are opened, could be heard on the street, and occasionally someone driving by would stop and look in the Church to see what was going on there.

    phoca_thumb_l_photo20The Matins and Liturgy was an extremely long service, due to it being a Hierarchical (bishop-led) service and due to the Enthronement elements being added on. Metropolitan Demetrius entered the Church, and was vested in the middle of the Church, which is something common among Russians, but almost never seen in Greek parishes. I asked some faithful if they had ever seen it before, and they replied that they had not. The Church continued to fill up. At the singing of the Thrice-Holy Hymn (Agios O Theos), there was a prayer read for the new Metropolitan, while he stood in the high place behind the altar. This was the second element of the Enthronement ceremony. Hymns were chanted in Greek, English, Slavonic, and Romanian.

    Bishop Auxentios's Speech
    Bishop Auxentios’s Speech

    At the conclusion of the Divine Liturgy was the final part of the Enthronement ceremony, where the new Metropolitan ascended his throne, various prayers were read, and an Encyclical from the Holy Synod was read in English and Greek. Various people made speeches, including a rather touching speech by His Grace Bishop Auxentios, who remarked on how in his earlier life he had been at the Cathedral (he had been baptized at our parish of St. Isidoros in Long Island by Bishop Petros’s brother Fr. Niphon in the 1970s) before departing for monasticism elsewhere, and due to the unfortunate splits in the Old Calendar Church in the 1970s and 1980s, finding himself in the afore-mentioned separate jurisdiction which recently united with us. He came full circle and was back where he started, much to his joy and ours. Some of the children of the Greek school made short speeches to the Metropolitan, and Gerondissa Synclitiki, who knew Metropolitan Chrysostomos of Florina, the second leader of the GOC (1937-1955) spoke of her joy.

    Clergy at the Banquet
    Clergy at the Banquet

    After the Liturgy ended, we went to the Chian Federation for the banquet. This banquet was a great opportunity for fellowship and for old friends to be reunited. There were several additional speeches, including a moving speech by Metropolitan Moses of Toronto, and by Bishop Iosif of Botoşani, who spoke in Romanian with an interpreter interpreting into English. He provided Metropolitan Demetrius with an icon of St. Glicherie, the Old Calendarist confessor of Romania, and icon prints to all present. The Cathedral of St. Markella provided the Metropolitan with a new staff. The Byzantine choir chanted various selections to the delight of the audience.

    The banquet wrapped up around 7:00 pm, and after seeing my Koumbari again, I left to return to Virginia, spiritually renewed. Many Years to our new Metropolitan!

    For the official report, including two photo galleries, see: http://hotca.org/news/28-ordinations/544-metropolitan-demetrius-enthroned

    For all of the 18 videos that I took at the Enthronement, see: https://www.youtube.com/user/anastasioshudson

  • My 2013 Paschal Weekend Adventure

    Last Sunday, May 5, Orthodox Christians around the world celebrated Easter, which we generally refer to as Pascha. Having received a kind invitation to visit my friend Fr. George Psaromatis in Maryland and stay with his family, I took Friday off and began my journey by car. There are three services that are generally served on Holy Friday in our Church, two of which are generally well-attended by the faithful: Vespers with the Unnailing from the Cross, which is generally celebrated in the early afternoon Friday, and the Matins of Holy Saturday, celebrated Friday evening by anticipation.

    Holy Friday Vespers Orthodox Church Richmond VA
    Holy Friday Vespers in Richmond, VA

    I couldn’t make the 1 pm Vespers service in Maryland, and I also wanted to pay a visit to my friends at St. Seraphim of Sarov Orthodox Church in Richmond, Virginia, where Fr. Nicodemos Gayle is the priest. They were having Vespers at 2 pm, so I decided to stop there on my way up to Maryland to pray with that community. It proved to be a good choice; I wasn’t rushed in my driving, and the service was fantastic. They have a beautiful building; their old building was gutted by fire, and they were able to rebuild from scratch a traditional Orthodox Church edifice a few years back.

    This was also my first time back to Church since I resigned the priesthood and returned to the lay state. I was a little apprehensive, fearing the unknown, but Fr. Nicodemos told me he would take care of notifying people so there would be no surprises. When I arrived, everyone was completely welcoming, and I felt touched by their kindness. After the one hour service, which features a symbolic taking down of an icon of Christ on the Cross and wrapping Him in a burial sheet, followed by bringing out the Epitaphios, a type of burial shroud with an icon of Christ in the tomb on it, we had light refreshments, this being a strict fast day, and then I took leave of these kind Christians and continued on my way.

    The journey up to Crofton, Maryland was a long one. I expected there to be traffic, but it was worse than I had expected. The Washington, DC area has some of the worst traffic in the country. What should have taken me 2 hours took me 3 hours. The Matins service at St. Nicholas Orthodox Mission in Crofton began at 6 pm, but I arrived at 6:50 pm. I feared I had missed a lot, but thankfully, the service continued on for another three and a half hours, ending at 10:30 pm. Orthodox services are blissfully long!

    What does one do for four and a half hours in Church, you might ask? The entire service is chanted, with beautiful ancient melodies resonating throughout the room. The priest often comes out of the altar area in order to cense (which means to produce incense with a tool called a censer), or perform other actions. We also had a procession outdoors around the block that evening. Bible readings occur, and basically we perform a funeral service for Our Lord. Holy Week in the Orthodox Church is not a bystander event, but one which draws the worshippers into the midst of the action, not just remembering what occurred 2000 years ago, but making us a part of it anew, as we go through the journey with Christ through His Crucifixion, Burial, and Resurrection.

    St. Nicholas is a mission community, which means it is just getting started, so it doesn’t have a fancy building, but it has a core group of faithful who are working hard to establish a permanent place of worship. For the meantime, they are meeting in a rented facility, which although small and makeshift, does not lack anything and is in every way as Orthodox as an established parish such as St. Seraphim’s.

    After the service, I returned to Fr. George’s brother’s home, where I was treated to kind hospitality by his brother and sister-in-law. We got to sleep late, and then awoke Saturday morning in order to have another service, this time a Divine Liturgy (communion service). At this point, the priest in many local traditions changes from dark vestments to light vestments, although such is not too common in the Greek practice. There are 15 readings from the Old Testament, the most prominent being one from the Book of Daniel, where we recount the Three Youths (Shadrack, Meeshack, and Abendnago) in the furnace, and then chant a magnificent hymn called “Arise, O God!” where we celebrate Christ’s breaking the bonds of death and Hades (the realm of death, Sheol, where all the dead of the Old Testament went, regardless of whether they were good or not; no one could enter Paradise until Christ destroyed the power of Death). In some places in Greece and the Arab nations, bay leaves are thrown and chairs and other things are banged to symbolize the locks being shattered. Fr. George and the parish did not do this, not being familiar with the practice, but I hope to cross-pollinate a little by next year and see it happen there…forgive my presumption!

    Pascha Orthodox Church Crofton MD
    Pascha in Crofton, MD

    Holy Saturday afternoons are for rest; Fr. George and I went to lunch to discuss the recent events of my life, and he gave me encouragement and good advice. Then back to the house for rest. We returned to the Church at around 11 pm, and the Pascha service began! The moment was finally here, that we had been waiting for! The beautiful hymns of Resurrection, joyous in both content and nature, replaced the slow, somber melodies we had previously heard. The tomb is empty! Christ the Lord is risen! Orthodox Christians sing a hymn that goes like this:

    “Christ is risen from the dead; by death hath He trampled down death by death, and on those in the graves, hath He bestowed life!”

    It is repeated a multitude of times throughout the five hour service.

    We ended around 4:30 in the morning, and then broke out the meat and dairy products—food that Orthodox Christians fast from during the 40 days of Lent and 7 days of Holy Week. Not only were we spiritually renewed, but we feel a joyous physical relief from the burdens of fasting.

    Coming back to the house, I went to sleep, only to be awoken by Fr. George’s five children playing around 10:30 am. I came out and began to speak to them. They are kind, intelligent children, ranging in age between 2 and 10, and I truly enjoyed speaking with them. They are also extremely polite; they offered to help me carry my luggage to the car. I see in them the result of good parenting, and hope for the same in my own life. High expectations combined with lots of love and attention from the parents—founded in a life of prayer, of course—are the right mix to ensure well-behaved children.

    A brief 30 minute service was held around 1:30 pm, and then I took leave of this pious Christian family. They were headed for the big parish barbeque (lamb is generally roasted on a spit by Greeks Pascha afternoon) owing to needing to travel back home, but even so, I left feeling fulfilled and refreshed.

    As an aside, I have to mention that something ironic happened while I was there. When I was a priest doing mission work among Americans, I always saw myself as a type of bridge between the Greeks up North at the Cathedral and the converts I was baptizing in the South. Many Greeks are sensitive to their culture being preserved, and rightfully so; however, at times this goes over into issues of language in services, and there are concerns about what is going on in missions with English liturgies and people not being familiar with Greek, Greeks, and the history of the Church in Greece.

    From the convert perspective, there is of course the concern that one does not need to become another culture in order to become Orthodox, and an expectation that liturgy would be in a language that they understand, and so I generally would try to show people that there is a type of generic Orthodox culture and way of life that has to be grasped in addition to the dogmatic side of things, while also showing the Greeks I know that English liturgies do not take away from their own experience of the faith. I learned some Greek and even can sing several Greek folk songs so that Greeks would know that what I was doing was in no way aimed at changing the Church they grew up with.

    Well, there were a lack of Greek people who were trained in chanting this time around, so yours truly was handed the book several times in order to execute some of the chant in Greek for the benefit of those who were first-generation Greek speakers. I also was asked to read the Catechetical Homily of St. John Chrysostom in Greek after Fr. George read it in English. He is able to read Greek, but only if he practices it thoroughly, which didn’t happen owing to the hustle and bustle of the week. So the convert guy saved the day for Greek chant and readings. Funny how things work out sometimes!

    I would also like to add that this was the first time in five years that I had experienced Pascha as a layman, and had been at my mission Nativity of the Holy Theotokos Orthodox Church in Greenville, North Carolina in years past. In 2012, we had 32 people there, having started in 2008 with 3 people. I always enjoyed spending Pascha there with the fine people of the parish, and while I had a blessed time in Virginia and Maryland, I truly missed my old parish community during this holy time of the year.

    Having become refreshed at these two Orthodox Christian parishes, I highly recommend them to anyone in the area. St. Nicholas Mission will be getting a website soon, at which point I will update this blog post. Whether convert or cradle Orthodox, these two traditional Orthodox parishes will provide you with the means to have peace in your life and save your soul. I thank God for allowing me to worship with them last weekend.

  • St. Markella’s Reflection

    Exterior of the Cathedral of St. Markella
    Exterior of the Cathedral of St. Markella

    I really like our Cathedral, St Markella’s, in Astoria, NY. It always seems so alive, with things going on every day all day long.  One thing that is different about a church in the middle of the city is it is open all day every day for people to go and pray. You don’t get that in suburban churches as much; the local Greek (New Calendar) Church in Raleigh, North Carolina, where I live, is set up on a hill with trees around it for instance.  I can understand why this is, but I still love visiting New York and knowing I can go in the Church and light a candle or talk to a clergyman, monk, or nun if I need to.

    Liturgy at St Markella’s is fantastic. It usually begins with Matins around 8 am.  Most people are not there yet (an unfortunate practice everywhere, I have noticed) but the service begins quietly. The psalms are recited reverently and then the hymns begin to be chanted in magnificent Byzantine style.  There are several chanters, but one in particular I am fond of, who has a rather powerful command of the chant. When he sings, I imagine that he is pounding the music, reminding it who is in control.  It is very conducive to the flow and order of the prayer to have the chanter in absolute control of the music.

    My favorite part is when the bishop comes out to bless the first time during Matins. Something about him coming out with his staff and blessing, then ascending his throne. It is very moving to me.  Matins continues, and the priest reads the Gospel. He then covers his hands and his face with his vestments so that we will venerate the Gospel book but not his hand. Liturgy begins and goes on for about 2 hours.  The Cherubic hymn is sometimes upwards of 10 minutes. It is so beautiful. I once had a strong experience while praying during this time.

    There is a strong fellowship after the Liturgy and the people do many projects together such as our Homeless Program.  Not everything is perfect at our Cathedral but it is a real community and I feel a true part of it. Even though I now live eight hours away and am working on a mission, whenever I visit I feel spiritually recharged and I rejoice at the chance to see my friends there.

    Our diocese has a Metropolitan Council and it has members from all of the parishes and monasteries.  It was a real blessing to be at the inaugural meeting and to see the sense of common purpose.  We are working towards the same goal: maintaining and propagating the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ—the Orthodox Church.  We are people from many different areas working together for the same goal, Greeks, Americans, and Russians among others.

    I am so proud to be an Orthodox Old Calendarist and I am so blessed to be a member of this wonderful Church.